Yep, 7 months…not 9
I swear, when I feel like nothing more can surprise me with the public and this pregnancy, I am blown away again. It’s incredible how people act like they wonder how I left the house in my condition, yet it is never those people who offer to do anything nice either. I am fine with no one offering to get me a glass of water or a place to sit down- but perhaps you can leave all your shitty manners where they came from when you are telling me that you are surprised I am functioning at all. Let’s just act like I am “normal” if you can’t refrain from scaring me about childbirth or reminding me how hard it is to shoot weddings at 7 months…deal?
Recently, I had a conversation with a lady guest at a wedding that has been on my mind and I have to share–
Just doing my job, I walk up to a lady probably in her early 30s holding a newborn baby boy and ask her if I can take their picture. I ask questions about the little guy and find out quickly that she isn’t the mother and is holding the baby for a friend. From there, the conversation shifted to her asking how far along I am in my pregnancy.
Her: oh! So you are going to pop any day now!?
Me: No, not really…still have to let him cook for TWO MORE MONTHS. (lady must be drunk…)
Her: Well, let me tell you something, don’t take this the wrong way- I can say this because I am a mother.
But you look READY! I mean, you look like he is ready to come out any day.
Me: Well, I hope not because he isn’t done growing, but thank you.
Her: Do you have a name yet?
Me: Not quite decided yet- but we still have TWO MONTHS LEFT
Her: well you should name him “David”- I always thought it was a great name.
Me: ok………….well if I name him David, I will definitely accredit you.
Her: Aww! You don’t have to!
Me: -polite laugh- okay, I am going to get back to my job now…
I am not kidding. And why didn’t I ever think of a unique name like “David”? Lady obviously knows her shit, and since she is a mother- she has the right to say whatever she wants about other people’s motherhood.
I keep laughing about this- had to share. I think I am just going to start telling people that I’m not pregnant at all.